The world is just so unfair. There are people who are rich, smart, good looking and talented. While many have to worried about their survival everyday. I belong to the average class. However i always think why cant i belong to the group of people who owns everythings. I guess everyone will have something to complain about themselves but just how much they complain. The world is jus so unfair!
There is a serious need to post now, if not i will have to wait unit next weekend then i will have a chance to do so. Quite a number of things happend this week. I was posted to 42 SAR at sungei gedong which is very far from my place. To make it worst, i have to stay in. =( really dragged staying in. Havent got a chance to see my CSM and OC because my company is currently having block leave, so my QM also ask me to clear too. Really scared of making friends there. Especially when everybody there know each other except me.
Went shopping with mum today and brought quite a few stuff. So happy about it. I still got a very long list of things to buy. I will need quite 'a bit' of money to buy. Haha!
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Monday, July 23, 2007
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Emotions
Suddenly feel so emotional again. I guess is because one of my buddy will be going overseas later. So many people leaving the country. My second brother will also be leaving soon. Also maybe because i am listening to lee hom new album. I personally feel that the album is quite good. A lot of emo songs. =) something that i will prefer more.
My journey in STC will finished soon, and i will soon be going to my unit. Really scared of going to the unit. I think is because i seriously do not know what is going to happen and i feel really insecure.
I want someone that will care for me. I want people to be as sensitive as me. But as i have say before. I shouldnt impose my values on others. There is so much to say. But i do not know how to put it in the correct way. The world just sucks! The darkness in people makes the world feels so cold and such a hard place to live in. I am really looking forward to the day, the day when everyone will care about each other deep inside their heart. Nobody how sad i am feeling, i will still put a smile on my face, cause i want people around me to be happy. =)
My journey in STC will finished soon, and i will soon be going to my unit. Really scared of going to the unit. I think is because i seriously do not know what is going to happen and i feel really insecure.
I want someone that will care for me. I want people to be as sensitive as me. But as i have say before. I shouldnt impose my values on others. There is so much to say. But i do not know how to put it in the correct way. The world just sucks! The darkness in people makes the world feels so cold and such a hard place to live in. I am really looking forward to the day, the day when everyone will care about each other deep inside their heart. Nobody how sad i am feeling, i will still put a smile on my face, cause i want people around me to be happy. =)
Sunday, July 15, 2007
timbre!
We really had a very hard time finding that place. That place quite deserted and far away from SMU! But ed told me it is jus behin SMU. haha! We really hard a good time at timbre. The food there is really nice and the drinks there is also great! However, i think we shoudnt have ordered the martini side drinks. It is not as good! haha! I think we enjoyed our time there, except the two stupid guys. There just have to always show their coolness!
Friday, July 13, 2007
Future
Seriously, i am unsure of my future. I never seriously go think about it before. . Many people at least have a idea of what they want to do in the future, but I am so unsure of my future. At least now i still have time to think about it due to army. I have gotten a place in NUS faculty of engineering but that is not i seriously want. I jus apply that because i dont like to study, so no matter studying what will also make no difference. My brother tell me to try applying for accounting degree next year, because at least that will give me more future next time in the society. What i seriously have interest in is actually cooking. I actually hope to become a chef next time in my life. haha! So i am now planning of taking up cooking lessons with my friends or my brother girlfriend.
I am also very unsure about my love life. It is so difficult to maintain one especially....... shouldnt talk about it. =) At least what i am very sure of is that i have a very good family. They are the people that i can really trust. The next thing will be my group of friends. I am sure we will still be very good buddies in the future. No doubt of this!
I am also very unsure about my love life. It is so difficult to maintain one especially....... shouldnt talk about it. =) At least what i am very sure of is that i have a very good family. They are the people that i can really trust. The next thing will be my group of friends. I am sure we will still be very good buddies in the future. No doubt of this!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
I cried
It had been a long time since i last cried. I totally cant remember when is the last time i cried. I think it is because army is jus not exhausting and make u no time to cry. haha! i cried today while sending my brother off for his sail. It is 6 months i emphasize. It is not a short period at all. I do not know why. But i guess i have got really attached to my family these 2 years. I guess it is army that make u cherish your family more. At least army does has its good points sometimes.
Friday, July 6, 2007
Love, Friendship and Family
I think i am very stupid. haha! My blog name is so simple that yuklum found it so easily. I never tell people about this blog because i feel that there is no need to do that. I just want to pen down my thoughts. Blogspot is actually quite stupid. I went to edit one of the previous post cause of some grammar mistake. Then that post became the post of the day. What the hell. haha.!
I have been thinking a lot recently. About love, about friendship, about my family. I guess these three things is the most important things in my life and that is why i always think about them. My love life havent been very successful all along. I tends to feel lonely at times. haha! As you know my life actually makes me very difficult to step into the circle. I want to be in the closet and not exposed. Confusing ah! haha!
My second brother was talking to me this morning about our family. He was updating me what he realised is happening to everyone which i havent go and seriously take note of. So lousy of me. My older brother will be going on sail on the 10th and my second brother will also be going back australia. Feel so sad when thinking about it. Its like the house will be so quiet again without them. I have always been so dependant on both my brothers at times. I scared i will be lose without them. But i guess i need to be independant. At least i still have ah ting with me at home.
I have been thinking a lot recently. About love, about friendship, about my family. I guess these three things is the most important things in my life and that is why i always think about them. My love life havent been very successful all along. I tends to feel lonely at times. haha! As you know my life actually makes me very difficult to step into the circle. I want to be in the closet and not exposed. Confusing ah! haha!
My second brother was talking to me this morning about our family. He was updating me what he realised is happening to everyone which i havent go and seriously take note of. So lousy of me. My older brother will be going on sail on the 10th and my second brother will also be going back australia. Feel so sad when thinking about it. Its like the house will be so quiet again without them. I have always been so dependant on both my brothers at times. I scared i will be lose without them. But i guess i need to be independant. At least i still have ah ting with me at home.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Values
There are actually quite a few reasons why i want to create a blog. Firstly, i am a person who always dont think logically. Most of the time, i use my emotions to help me think. That is why i often screw things up. I wan to use the blog to help me think. Secondly, by posting i can keep in touch with english. My english is already very screwed up, that is why i am using blog to do some writing. Thirdly, what people normally use the blog for, to post down what have happened in their life.
Yesterday, i was brought to Tan Tock Seng hospital. Apparently i took a medicine, Synflex, which is suppose to relieve the pain i have in my knee. However, i was allergic to the medicine and it causes both of my eyes to swell. It was so bad that i have to go to hospital. During the time while i was in hospital, i realise quite a number of things. I should stop prejudging people and also blackmarking a person by the small things he does. I realise how i always impose my values on the people around me. That is why i always get unhappy easily.
Everybody have their own set of values in their life. All these values have different kinds of meanings to every individual. Everybody have their own way of thinking. Thus people always have expectation of others. Many people actually imposed their own set of values on the people around them. They did this without realising it. They actually hopeed people around them to behave in a manner which they want it to be. I am definitely someone like that. I always hope things can happened the way i want it to be and people can treat me the way how i treat them. I always have high expectations on people. That is why i always feel disappointed with people easily because i have high expectations on people. I know this is a wrong thing to do as i shouldnt impose my values on other people. That is why i am trying to change myself. =)
Yesterday, i was brought to Tan Tock Seng hospital. Apparently i took a medicine, Synflex, which is suppose to relieve the pain i have in my knee. However, i was allergic to the medicine and it causes both of my eyes to swell. It was so bad that i have to go to hospital. During the time while i was in hospital, i realise quite a number of things. I should stop prejudging people and also blackmarking a person by the small things he does. I realise how i always impose my values on the people around me. That is why i always get unhappy easily.
Everybody have their own set of values in their life. All these values have different kinds of meanings to every individual. Everybody have their own way of thinking. Thus people always have expectation of others. Many people actually imposed their own set of values on the people around them. They did this without realising it. They actually hopeed people around them to behave in a manner which they want it to be. I am definitely someone like that. I always hope things can happened the way i want it to be and people can treat me the way how i treat them. I always have high expectations on people. That is why i always feel disappointed with people easily because i have high expectations on people. I know this is a wrong thing to do as i shouldnt impose my values on other people. That is why i am trying to change myself. =)
Thoughts
I always think that I am very sensitive to the surroundings and the people around me. However, after so long with the help of theron, i finally realised that i am actually oblivous to the surroundings around me. I forgotten about my brother and father birthdays or to be more precise, i do not know when is their birthday. I am so ashamed of myself. I think my brother was actually quite disappointed with me. So, i decided to remember their birthday from now onwards. haha!
30/03/1993 - ah ting
15/06/1982 - ah kor
18/07/1956 - daddy
09/08/1985 - ah bee
04/11/1988 - me!
28/12/1957 - mummy
I am always not thinking properly and logically. My mind is always floating around. Now i then realise my mind is actually not wokrkign properly. I cant organise my thoughts well and i cant remember clearly things in the past. This is actually very bad for my brain and that explains why i always cant brainstorm well. In another words, i am actually stupid. haha! From now on, i am trying to think about whatever things that happened in the past instead of lettign my mind floats around. Theron says this actually will help me think better in the future!
30/03/1993 - ah ting
15/06/1982 - ah kor
18/07/1956 - daddy
09/08/1985 - ah bee
04/11/1988 - me!
28/12/1957 - mummy
I am always not thinking properly and logically. My mind is always floating around. Now i then realise my mind is actually not wokrkign properly. I cant organise my thoughts well and i cant remember clearly things in the past. This is actually very bad for my brain and that explains why i always cant brainstorm well. In another words, i am actually stupid. haha! From now on, i am trying to think about whatever things that happened in the past instead of lettign my mind floats around. Theron says this actually will help me think better in the future!
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Friends or Acquaintance?
Acquaintance - a person whom one knows but who is not a particularly close friend.
Friend - one attached to another by affection or esteem.
I finally completed half year of my NS life. This half year of my army life have been quite smooth and fun. I have got acquainted to a lot of people and i think i have actually met some good friends in army. The most shocking thing in army is that i have been with clement, my jc friend, for these 6 months. I think he is one of my best friend i met during this period.
I usually find it quite hard to differentiate between acquiantance and friend. I seriously think i need to differentiate between these two. I usually put a lot of trust into my friends and i expect them to give me the attention i am giving them. I hate being left out of a group and people to purposely neglect me. I wont have all these problems with acquaintances because i wont be so emotionally attached to them.
I think my life have been very blessed. I have met a group of very good buddies during my secondary school life. Till now, i am still very attached to them and i am very happy that they are in my life. I dont know what will i be if these group of people is not in my life. =)
Friend - one attached to another by affection or esteem.
I finally completed half year of my NS life. This half year of my army life have been quite smooth and fun. I have got acquainted to a lot of people and i think i have actually met some good friends in army. The most shocking thing in army is that i have been with clement, my jc friend, for these 6 months. I think he is one of my best friend i met during this period.
I usually find it quite hard to differentiate between acquiantance and friend. I seriously think i need to differentiate between these two. I usually put a lot of trust into my friends and i expect them to give me the attention i am giving them. I hate being left out of a group and people to purposely neglect me. I wont have all these problems with acquaintances because i wont be so emotionally attached to them.
I think my life have been very blessed. I have met a group of very good buddies during my secondary school life. Till now, i am still very attached to them and i am very happy that they are in my life. I dont know what will i be if these group of people is not in my life. =)
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